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It isn’t likely to happen, but IF the Des Moines Register did decide to cover the story about Des Moines Public School Superintendent Thomas Ahart and his wife, we thought we would speculate what the headline may be. Here are some of the possibilities:

Ahart mixes church & state with costume, DMPS badge

DMPS superintendent’s wife tweets are mostly sane

President Trump’s likeness is still grabbing women by the (you know what)

Ahart’s wife poised to substitute for sex ed teacher, Trump costume will Make Sex Ed Great Again

DMPS showdown with state not fueled at all by mild disagreements between Ahart’s wife and Gov. Reynolds

In rare display of political fairness, Ahart’s wife gives equal time to GOP, Dems on social media

RUMOR: Reynolds orchestrates Russian hack of Ahart’s social media in effort to force DMPS students into COVID hot zones

Few angered by Ahart’s tweets, but hey, remember that kid raising money for the children’s hospital— he was a MONSTER

If you have any suggestions, feel free to share them in the comments of the Facebook post!

Author: Jacob Hall